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The psyche doesn't change, according to Solomon, author of "Love and War and Intimate Relationships."įor women, with so much on their plates, "they get tired of always being the strong one" she said. She said the book is rather tame by bondage standards and mirrors an age-old fantasy among women.
Marion Solomon, a couples' therapist who coordinates mental health training at ULCA, said that even though women have made "great progress" in gender equality, biological models still prevail: strong male, submissive female.
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In different columns in The New York Times last weekend, Maureen Dowd and Frank Bruni suggest the submissive female phenomenon may be linked to women's rise to economic and political power.Īfter taking charge in the workplace and bossing the children around at home, women can be turned on by surrendering that control.īruni notes the trend is also seen in the new HBO series "Girls" - a modern "Sex and the City," whose main character matter-of-factly enjoys submissive sex games.īold and aggressive Samantha Jones, she is not.Īnd Bruni asks, "Gloria Steinem went to the barricades for this? Salaries may be better than in decades past and the cabinet and Congress less choked with testosterone.
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You are mine," Grey tells Steele after he takes her virginity.Īfter her first spanking, the "dom" congratulates his "sub:" "Well done, baby." She coos to the reader: "His words curl around me like a soft fluffy towel from the Heathman Hotel, and I'm so pleased he's happy."ĥ0 Shades of Grey Has Post-Feminist Appealīut how does a cross between the "Story of O" and a Harlequin romance sit with a generation of post-feminists who are in full charge of their careers and are unabashedly straightforward about their sexual needs? "Every time you move tomorrow, I want you to be reminded that I've been here. "But when you're a young mom and everyone depends on you for everything - your husband your mother - the idea of having someone take care of you and telling you what to do, even in twisted sense, it rocks their boat." "One woman couldn't believe her friend was so gushing about it," she said. The print on-demand version comes in and goes out right away." "None of us at the bookstore have been able to read it. "Our customers are very smart and they say it's badly written, but they are in the middle of book three," laughed Margot Sage EL, co-owner of the Watchung Booksellers in Montclair, N.J., which carries the trilogy.
She refers to her genitals euphemistically as "my sex." Most agree it's a cheese-ball narrative whose heroine is incapable of using adult language. Its success raises the question how sexual submission, especially when pain is involved, could be such a turn-on for many young well-educated suburban women who are empowered economically and enlightened sexually.
Vintage Books just bought the rights to all three novels and Universal and Focus Features plan to do a film. So 90 percent of sales were discreet ebook downloads, according to the New York Times, which saw it rise to number one on its ebook fiction bestseller list in March. The novels were published by a small independent Australian press and hard copy distribution was limited.
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And the sex was a bonus."īritish mom and former TV producer James initially wanted to replicate the success of the "Twilight" fan fiction series. "She sees being submissive as a necessity to save him," she said. The heart of the romance is the notion of submission and the way in which Steele accommodates Grey to "make him love her," according to Rachel. "What I loved was that it was a great love story."
"I would never try anything with pain."īut, she got hooked on the romance that develops in the second book, when Steele tries to change Grey. "The first book is very, very graphic and harsh with a lot of S & M – and quite frankly, did not do it for me," she said. "I loved the book - all three," said Rachel, who has been married to her husband since she was 19 and has a healthy sex life. Grey instructs her to call him, "sir," and sets rules on everything from her diet to her most intimate grooming routines.